Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Tales of an Elmer Fudd Hunting trip

Well times have changed since Elmer Fudd days. We have text messaging. My sister is incapable of going 30 minutes at a time without sending a text. Rachel- “Seen anything” Rachel-“Did you turn off the coffeepot” Rachel-“We hear you”- Talking about a Semi on I-75 that really honked his horn like this for the whole time we were in ear shot. – BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP-BEEP-BEEP-BEEP-BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP-BEEP-BEEP-BEEP-BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP. That is the exact pattern of his horn blowing. If the deer didn’t run away on that, then they ran away hearing my cell phone vibrate.
Two doe had come into my eye sight, I would have shot, but still at a bad angle, and a lot of moving would have sent them fleeing for their lives. So I slowly moved, and turned, and they would turn away and I would move some more. Well their little heads popped up and looked directly at me when my phone started vibrating! Yes, I am aware that it should have been on silent, but I won’t get pertinent information like “GAME WARDEN…RUN” until too late if on silent! I mean I am hunting illegally, I have a NC driver’s license and hunting in GA. So as you can tell, that ended with no deer on the ground!
As time passed, I got restless, maybe I should drink coffee at 5:30 in the morning before a hunting trip. It just makes me not want to keep my ass in the seat. Also, not to mention I was freezing. Since I am short and my legs don’t touch the floor of the deer stand when sitting straight backed in the seat, I just would swing my legs from the knee down like I was running. I am sure this looks like a nugget (midget) running. I was trying to get some blood flowing and get my body warm. After no deer, I decided to walk out to the field (use to have peanuts, and now it’s the local Cheer’s for the deer) So I lay down on the ground and wait for them to come out, the day before I saw about 6 in the field, today…none!
Oh well, Rachel sends me a text saying she is heading to the car. I start walking that way, with gun pointed down across the field (you will see in a minute why that information is important). While I am walking, I start to take out the bullets out of the chamber (which I do every time just like this time). Buuuuuuuuuut….this time, something happens, when I flip the safety switch off (because to open the chamber it has to be off safety) the gun goes off. I shot DIRT! As I stand motionless, shocked, and well frankly really confused , Rachel comes running out of the woods from her car. She thought I shot a deer in the field behind the car. Nope, just the ground!!
After we get in the car, still a little shell shocked about it, she starts backing up out of her hidden parking spot, pulled in among trees, we hear and feel a thud! She backed into a tree. I mean…killed her tail light.
Oh well, let’s tally up the kills for the day…dirt and tree! Now that’s what I call a bad day hunting!!

No comments: