Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Relationship Quotes and My $0.02

So on twitter I follow @ihatequotes. They have many quotes about break ups, relationships past, and a lot of other stuff that is influential in life. I have to admit, most of their break ups/relationships past quotes kind of bother me....I honestly think they are garbage! Let me break a few down for you.

1. Break-up. It's not like a twitch before dying. It's a generator! To grow stronger coz God knows you deserve someone better! #ihatequotes
Why I have an Issue With It:
"coz God knows you deserve someone better"...Here is my problem with that comment: It's saying that the person you formerly were with is a bad person, not worthy of your love. It's very bashing. My boyfriend has ex girlfriends, and if they were to say this, it would be as if they were bashing him as a human, and I find offense in that. He is a good person. Same goes with my ex's, they aren't bad people. It's not about finding someone "better" or more deserving of your love per se, it's more about finding someone that fits with your life, and that both people are happy when together. People have relationships, but as life evolves, our needs in relationships change, that's it. No one should claim that their Ex just didn't deserve them, because it's not about deserving, it just wasn't a match.

2. The most commonly broken promise: "I will love you forever." -@humsyourlife #ihatequotes
Why I have an Issue With It:
The problem I have with this, is because it isn't true. It's not a commonly broken promise. You will (should) love someone forever. Your love for someone has just changed. The issue is, many people don't know the difference between loving someone and being IN love with someone. I love my ex boyfriend (as in I do other friends, I want the best for him) , but I Love and am IN LOVE with my current (and better be final 'smiley face here').

3. DamnItsTrue You never really stop loving someone, you just learn to keep the feelings inside. #DamnItsTrue
Why I have an Issue With It: "you just learn to keep the feelings inside", you shouldn't keep the feelings inside. If you keep them inside you can never truly let go to be able to love again. Talk them out, even if it is to a brick wall.

4. Moving on is a sweet process of proving to others and yourself that you're off better without that person. -Scott McClellan #ihatequotes

Why I have an Issue With It: Moving on isn't about proving anything, it's about putting the past behind you and looking toward the future. If you are moving on strictly to prove something, it's not moving on, it's being stuck in a vicious cycle of trying to play the part, and never giving the next person a chance. Those that pose are constantly looking around to see who is looking(i.e. Seeing if Ex's notice and are jealous), and not looking at the person that they are currently with.

5. A woman has got to love a bad man once or twice in her life, to be thankful for a good one. -M.K. Rawlings #ihatequotes
Why I have an Issue With It:I have never loved a bad man, but I am thankful for the Great one I have know. It goes back to bashing guys....why must you bash? Because it didn't work, does it make him a bad man? No. It means it didn't work . This makes women in failed relationship look like victims. Relationships fail, it's life. All failed relationships and decisions get you to where you are in life. For all of those failed things in my life, I am thankful.

I am someone's Ex, my boyfriend is someone's Ex, but we are both good people. Failed relationships got us to to where we are. I am thankful for his relationships in the past, as I hope he is of mine, because without those past loves and relationships, would we be who we are now, would we be where we are now. I wish everyone would stop playing the victim and accept that a failed relationship is a learning experience, as people we evolve. I am a different person at 28 than I was at 19 when I first fell in love, I am thankful for that, but I don't think less of the person I was in love with back then.

Some I do believe in:

You can go wherever you want. In the end, you'll always come back to those who are really meant for you. -@WilzKanadi #ihatequotes
Why I believe in it: If you only know the story of Mike and Kelly. :)

If you know why you fall in love, you aren't in love. -Luciano Pavarotti #ihatequotes
Why I believe in it: Mike has asked me before "Why do you love me?" My answer is always, "I don't know". Not because I am just avoiding the answer, it's because I honestly don't know. It's one of those things where every fiber of your being feels something for someone, that's what it was like shortly after I first met him so long ago. There was some pull. I can't describe it and it's hard to explain why I fell in love, I just fell.

My wish is that everyone would see the good in the people they once dated and loved. If you see the good in them, instead of focusing on the bad, then you will be able to find the good in someone else. Being bitter over failed relationships gets you nothing but a scowl on your face and wrinkles. No one wants premature be happy that you had an opportunity to be apart of someone's life and they were apart of yours, hope only for the best for them, and use wrinkle cream.

But seriously, if you waste your time hating someone, you are wasting your time not truly loving someone. So LOVE them all, but be IN LOVE with one.