Michael Jackson memorial service

I didn't expect to shed tears, I didn't know him personally, but unexpected tears started pouring when the pallbearers brought the casket in. This is the first funeral I have seen/been to since my Daddy's in January. So many people are watching this service as fans, but if you step back and see this as a funeral of someones father, brother, son, you will see this differently. I found it disrespectful of the people in the Staple's Center to be cheering and clapping after speeches and performances. This wasn't a concert, it was a goodbye for a family as well.

I never thought I would find comfort in something from Stevie Wonder, but he said "We may want him here with us, but apparently God needed him so much more." I find comfort in that because I want and need my daddy here, but apparently God needed an experienced farmer in Heaven. I am telling you, there are some straight, tall rows of corn up there!

Jermaine Jackson sang the song, "Smile" and I feel different things about that song that I use to, death changes your perspective about a lot of things in life. As our loved ones leave us, we try to smile and go on with our lives, but I feel a twinge of guilt that I can be happy, I don't want to be happy without him because I start to feel that it looks like he wasn't that big a part in my life, and that is far from the truth.

This memorial service brought back many feelings from January, and I miss my Dad more every single day.

Smile though your heart is aching

Smile even though its breaking

When there are clouds in the sky, you'll get by

If you smile through your fear and sorrow

Smile and maybe tomorrow

You'll see the sun come shining through for you

Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may be ever so near

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, whats the use of crying?

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile

That's the time you must keep on trying

Smile, whats the use of crying?

You'll find that life is still worthwhile

If you just smile